This is the voice of the Mysterons

Does anyone else remember the great TV puppet show 'Captain Scarlet'?  Captain Scarlet was part of the organisation 'Spectrum', who of course all had colour names (in advance of 'Reservoir Dogs').  Colonel White was in charge, I think.  The jet pilots do not get colour names (who knows why?) but are called the Angels (apologies to Doc Neeson).


The weak link in this whole shebang are the baddies, 'The Mysterons'.  Their main problem is a tendency to tell everyone what they are about to do.  You would think they would get sick of being stopped by Spectrum and change the plan.  They even have a secret agent, the wicked Captain Black, working against Spectrum.  I suppose Captain Black is cancelled out by Captain Scarlet (apologies to the Pimpernel) who is Indestructable!  Cue the theme song....."In dest ruct able Cap tain Scar let da da da"!

So. Back to the Mysterons.  What is a mystery is why they are so useless.  Every single time they go to do something a voice says "This is the voice of the Mysterons"...as though we don't know.  Only heard it 50 times.  Then..."We are going to destroy [insert place here]".  They always use a really weak riddle to 'disguise' the target (!).  Funnily enough, their plan always ends up in one shape, which is that of a Pear.  Below is a picture of a Mysteron plan, today:

Seriously, why do they bother?  Imagine the Mysterons and the Titanic! "This is the Voice of the Mysterons.  We are going to stick a big iceberg in front of the Titanic".  Absolute waste of effort.  Left to the Mysterons, the Titanic would still be sailing around today.  Below is the Titanic before a Mysteron attack:

The next picture shows the Titanic after a Mysteron attack:

As for the Mysterons, between 1912 and 2012 they would have changed their announcement to "This is the voice of the Mysterons, and we confess that we are all-round Prongs".  That would take about the same amount of time to say, and would represent truth in advertising. 

Sic transit gloria